Wooden beams in my Tavern. They hold the roof up well and I do not complain. But the Oz ex-PM Ju-liar Gillard was forever complaining of glass ceilings. And 'Pay Gaps'.
And it was not because she could see the stars or the wind was blowing through her walls.
The 'Womyn's' complaint. Or one or two of them. One of many, many faux-victimhoods. It is soooo hard to be a woman in a man's world., claim the feminists. You know, that man's world full of men who go out to sea in rough weather to put the Scampi on Gillard's menu (no, not 'that' menu). The men who climb high towers to fix the roof; descend into mines; plough fields; do all the hard, dirty, dangerous work. That man's world.
Yes women find it so hard that they avoid the hard jobs like the plague and just demand the danger money.
And the top jobs.
But the glass ceiling stops them getting the top jobs, so they demand quotas.
But hold on. The topist job in the country is occupied by a woman. Betty Windsor. The Queen.
Then there is her Rep here, Quentin Bryce. The Governor General. Another woman.
And up to yesterday the Prime Minister job. Ju-liar Gillard. A woman.
I think. Well, she said she was, but she is well known for being unable to tell the truth.
So where is this glass ceiling?
Gillard has been ousted and will have more to time complain now. She loses her PM's pay packet. But all is not lost. For the rest of her life, while men search the rough seas for her fish supper, she will have to get by on her pension. Let's take a look at the penury she faces.
$200,000 a year
The Lodge and Kirribilli House and the VIP jet will soon be memories for Ms Gillard and her partner, Tim Mathieson, but superannuation rules for long-term MPs are generous. They state that a maximum pension is calculated at 75 per cent of the salary payable to the highest office a politician has held. Ms Gillard's highest office - that of Prime Minister - paid a salary during the past year of $494,430.
That implies an annual pension of a cool $371,572.50. However, legislation to prevent windfall superannuation gains following massive pay rises for politicians last year modifies the payout to about $200,000 a year, indexed.
Ms Gillard will also be entitled to an office, staff, a car and a lifetime Gold Pass entitling her to free air travel, a perk denied lesser MPs who were required to trade away the Gold Pass entitlement for last year's big pay rises.
Oh the poor thing. The Feminists are right. It is hell being a woman. She is only 50 so she is going to have to live on that paltry sum for another 35 years.
Well, my good heart hopes she has a long, healthy life. But.... (Kevin, put that club down !!)
Not to worry though. Those men leaving harbour tonight to head out to sea will keep on earning to pay the taxes to pay her pension.
They only have to cough up $7,000,000. Before indexing.
(No worries. She'll be right. The miner chaps will cough up too. And the roofers.)
Many of them vote labour.
Average labour-voter's wage? or Julia's $494Kpa?
Must be the fish. That's it. Those male bastards must get free fish !!! Misogynists.
I hope there are no storms for them tonight.
Pass her a drink.