Parody was never as Weird.

Everyone's an expert.  Everyone has something to say about even mild mannered Tavern Keepers.  If it isn't the 'too many sizes' of the typeface its the many typos. The background is too dark; my opinions are worth even less than those of my customers; the Bouncer is too slow in letting comments in; the very brightest people feel threatened by the sword under the counter, etc  People will take the piss, although if they leave it on the carpet, out they go.

Thankfully I had a visiting critic who put me straight on some matters, even in the restaurant.

His way of putting things in perspective while taking a rise out of everyone in sight were more than a little entertaining and after he'd made a song and dance about the problems some folk have with  blogging and the proper use of the English language he stayed on to give us a few songs and dances about other entertainers.  Yes, we were pulling the pints for Weird Al.


27. Counted.

He even took time to run a checker over the Tavern's computer. That was quite a task as we had to release all the steam pressure and rake out the wood burner.

Then before I could stop him he ran mayhem through the kitchens and the restaurant, dishing out culinary advice to the diners.

At this point we all wanted to join in. The words words and the virus words went by so fast that I had to put the next lot on a song-sheet so that all the customers could join in. Help yourselves. As he says " Have a big dinner, have a light snack, If you don't like it, you can't send it back." Michael Jackson will be rolling in his oven.

How come you're always such a fussy young man

Don't want no Captain Crunch, don't want no Raisin Bran

Well, don't you know that other kids are starving in Japan

So eat it, just eat it

Don't want to argue, I don't want to debate

Don't want to hear about what kind of food you hate

You won't get no dessert 'till you clean off your plate

So eat it

Don't you tell me you're full

Just eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it

Get yourself an egg and beat it

Have some more chicken, have some more pie

It doesn't matter if it's boiled or fried

Just eat it, eat it, just eat it, eat it

Just eat it, eat it, just eat it, eat it, ooh

Your table manners are some cryin' shame

You're playin' with your food, this ain't some kind of game

Now, if you starve to death, you'll just have yourself to blame

So eat it, just eat it

You better listen, better do what you're told

You haven't even touched your tuna casserole

You better chow down or it's gonna get cold

So eat it

I don't care if you're full

Just eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it

Open up your mouth and feed it

Have some more yogurt, have some more spam

It doesn't matter if it's fresh or canned

Just eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it

Don't you make me repeat it

Have a banana, have a whole bunch

It doesn't matter what you had for lunch

Just eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it

Eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it

Eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it

If it's gettin' cold, reheat it

Have a big dinner, have a light snack

If you don't like it, you can't send it back

Just eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it

Get yourself an egg and beat it (oh lord)

Have some more chicken, have some more pie

It doesn't matter if it's boiled or fried

Just eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it

Don't you make me repeat it (oh no)

Have a banana, have a whole bunch

It doesn't matter what you had for lunch

Just eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it

His career has shown a marked improvement in 'production values' since his early days and the amount of cooperation he gets from those he parodies is a measure of his talent. 

Many of the cast and production staff gave him more than a glad hand making that. Look closely and you might see someone you recognise.

And no-one is safe.

Personally, as a knackered older chap from a very refined and combative history  I find him hilarious. He likes the 'eating' theme it seems, and Jackson. We cleared a space for him to tell us about 'Got more Chins than Chinatown' ala MJ.

And Lady Gaga didn't escape his mirth either.

OK. That was getting ridiculous, but it was from a while back. 

But I was happy to pay for his help, with a free-flow of pints. A chap that sings so outrageously needs a well lubricated throat.  Did you catch the trademark '27'?  Why 27, do you think? Answers in a comment.

Pax