Under-Age Love

Chatter in the bar all too often turns to the epidemic of adults having sexual relations with children. Thankfully 'all too often' remains just 'sometimes' otherwise there would be a mixture of anger and gloom permeating the place.  Thank goodness for lighter matters.

I know it is a difficult subject but increasingly we are assailed by even politicians - like some of  the UK's Labour party - who actively support paedophilia with their P.I.E. (Paedophilia Information Exchange), and by the alarming increase in female teachers, especially in the USA who are abusing their position and sexually polluting, molesting and even raping under-age boys.

Was Harriet Harman a teacher once? I do not know.

Young molested girls suffer trauma and gain needed sympathy and help: boys get ignored.

Colorado middle school teacher, 24, 'had long-term sexual relationship with SIXTH GRADE student and gave him marijuana'

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3074349/Colorado-middle-school-teacher-Katerina-Bardos-long-term-sexual-relationship-sixth-grade-student-gave-marijuana-to.html?ito=social-facebook

• Katerina Bardos, 24, allegedly started relationship with 12-year-old student when she was a teacher at Brentwood Middle School in Greeley, Colorado

Er... 'relationship'?

• She taught sixth grade at the school from August 2013 through May 2014

• Bardos moved to Frontier Charter School in fall 2014, but allegedly continued the sexual relationship with the boy until just before the arrest

Er.... they mean 'RAPE', but as it is a female perpertrator they NEVER call it that. 

• She faces charges of sex assault on a child, sex assault on a child by one in a position of trust and contributing to the delinquency of a minor.

So, the media refuses to use the correct term. RAPE. 

They call it a 'Relationship'.

We usually and almost intuitively jump to thinking of nasty men sexually abusing and raping girls. But 'Intuition' is a very slippery and unreliable 'sense', if indeed sense it is at all and I have to remind customers to examine their ideas and where they come from, from time to time.

Then there is the growing presence of 'creeds' - well, one in particular - which has a vicious paedophile rapist cum murdering madman as its 'prophet', whose adherents think it perfectly fine to rape even toddlers. Of either sex.

That humanity can wallow in the mud, again all too often, cannot be denied. But was it always thus that children were sexualised young by 'grown ups'?

What is 'Under-Age'?

In the middle ages, when life was "solitary, poor, nasty, brutish and short" in Thomas Hobbes' words, it was quite common for barely-teens to be betrothed and married.  And not just peasant girls. Princesses were married off at 12. Betrothal may have had its period of time while the 'banns' were called but sexual relations were overlooked in those months - sometimes a year -  before marriage. 

Romeo and Juliet would be arrested today.

Well, Romeo would.

But that was way back. Things improved somewhat by the 19C. And even then there were social mores and morals that weighed heavily and reasonably on most. That socially mandated Moral Standing has been deteriorating ever since. But we still have lessons to learn from as recent as the American Civil War. My friend the Southern Gal has been researching and telling.

One can easily forget (again with an expectation that people then were like people today) that  educational groundings are very different now. The 'home-schooled' children of the 1800's had a firm moral base. They did not have perverted Ministers of Education - as in Canada  today - who were convicted sex offenders insisting on imposing 'Sex Education' on toddlers.

Thousands of Canadian Students Are Ditching Class to Protest Their Province's New Sex Ed Curriculum

Thousands of school children barely old enough to pronounce — let alone understand — words such as "masturbation" and "anal sex" ditched classes and took to the streets on Monday in Ontario to protest new changes to the provincial sex ed curriculum, which they say goes against their beliefs.

 https://news.vice.com/article/thousands-of-canadian-students-are-ditching-class-to-protest-their-provinces-new-sex-ed-curriculum

It was a successful first day for the "one week no school" strike organized by a group on Facebook that's calling on parents across Canada's most populous province to pull their children and teens out of class everyday this week.

But ordinary people - and children -  did back then, as now, have to navigate the Landscape of the Heart. They were simply better then at navigating because - some think, quite reasonably - they had that moral standing and training.

The 'older man / young girl' scenario played out just as much back then as now. Only now we have it the other way around too. But they dealt with it very differently back then. 

There was Patience. And Chasteness.

The Southern Gal offered an example from the letters sent by Civil War participants.  Here amongst the mud, cordite and carnage, when 600,000 died in bloody battle, men still retained a semblance of moral standing. They were 'steeped' in it. 

Such letters can be shocking so be warned. Some contain extraordinary examples of proper English usage, attention to grammar and syntax and even some hint of morals !!

"And how happy the thought that years increase the affection & esteem we have for each other to love & be loved. May it ever be so, and may I ever be a husband worthy of your warmest affections."

Letter from Harvey Black in Brandy Station, Virginia. 

http://spec.lib.vt.edu/cwlove/ 

Black, descended from the founding family of Blacksburg, Virginia, served as a surgeon to the Army of Northern Virginia. In this letter to his wife Mary (whom he affectionately nicknamed Mollie) he recounts their courtship and expresses the great love he has for her.

Brandy Station,

Sunday night, Nov. 1 [1863]

My dear Mollie

I rcd a letter today from a very handsome lady to play cupid. Although not accompanied by her likeness yet her image was so indelibly impressed upon my mind that the likeness itself could not recall the features more vividly than they are impressed. I first met her in a village in Western Va when I was about 17 years old and she 8.

Stop right there mister. What would customers in the bar think today if a lad were quaffing a pint and declaring that he was smitten by an eight year old girl? 

Think on that, and read on. 

I afterwards saw her frequently and occasionally was in her company, and nonwithstanding the disparity of our ages, I became so favorably impressed with her fair face and gentle manners that I frequently said to myself that I wished she was older or I younger.

In 3 to 4 years she had grown so much that the disparity in age seemed to grow less. Never did a lady witness the budding of a flower with more requisite pleasure than did I the budding of that pretty little girl into womanhood. 

She made much of my thoughts while in Mexico and more upon my return home. While at the University of Va., I not infrequently found my thoughts wandering from the dry textbook to contemplate by the aid of memory the features and form of this little girl.

After I completed my studies, I traveled in the west and expected to find a home in some western state, but not finding a place to suit me, together with the persuasions of that fair face, induced me to return.

I entered, as you know, actively into the pursuit of my profession with the determination to make at least a fair reputation and tried to withdraw my thought from everything else, but I found this little fairy constantly and pleasantly intruding into all my plans, whether of pleasure or interest. At this period she met me politely and respectfully but seemed to grow more distant, coy & reserved, so that I frequently thought that even the ordinary attentions of common politeness & courtesy were no special source of pleasure to her.

How very different from many a lad today, "Going His Own Way" resentful and lusting after lost love possibilities; distaining of all women because of the bad behaviour of those he has met.

In a few instances when she has arrived at about the age of 15 this shyness and reserve seemed to be forgotten, and I would pass an hour or two in the enjoyment of her company with great pleasure to myself and I imagined with at least satisfaction, if not enjoyment, to her. I began to think that my happiness was identified with hers. I began to pay her special visits or at least seek opportunities by which I might be in her company. 

I sought her society on pleasure rides and thought it not a hardship to ride 65 miles in 24 hours if part of the time might be spent with her. 

She always exhibited or observed the decorum of modest reserve which might be construed into neither encouragement nor discouragement.

After the delibertation & reflection which I thought due to a matter which involved my happiness for life, I felt that her destiny and mine were probably intended to be united, and that all the adverse counsel which I could give myself could bring no objections. 

I felt that I ought both as a matter of duty and happiness give my whole life to her, who for 9 years had my attention and devotion, though concealed love.

After a few little billets* and interviews, and with a full declaration of the love I desired to bestow, I received a measured and loving response and was made most happy in the anticipation of the celebration of the nuptials fixed at some 6 months hence. 

This time glided nicely & happily, though not too rapidly, away from me. The hours of leisure were spent with her and my visits were always welcomed with that cordial welcome, that maiden modesty, so much to be admired. 

Tis true that on one occasion she did rest her elbow upon my knee and look with confidential pleasure in my face and made me realize that indeed I had her whole heart.

Would that our children, young, older and almost ready for marriage went so far and no further. But of course Molly and Harvey did not have perverts in Government urging them to give way and at least do a bit of mutual M or even some A. 

Suffice it to say, the happy day of our marriage arrived and since then, hours, days, and years of time, confidence & happiness passed rapidly away, and only to make us feel that happy as were the hours of youthful days, they compare not with those of later years and perhaps even these may not be equal to that which is in reserve for us.

I dont know how much pleasure it affords you to go over these days of the past, but to me they will ever be remembered as days of felicity. And how happy the thought that years increase the affection & esteem we have for each other to love & be loved. May it ever be so, and may I ever be a husband worthy of your warmest affections. May I make you happy and in so doing be made happy in return. A sweet kiss and embrace to your greeting.

But maybe you will say it looks ridiculous to see a man getting grayhaired to be writing love letters, so I will use the remnant of my paper otherwise...

Yours affectionately H Black

*(letters, billet-deux)

He waited. He was constant. She grew. They grew together. 

16 and 25 is a far better match.

Maybe even better would be 18 and 27.

And vice versa; slightly older woman, young man.

But NOT Vice.

No bars, nightclubs, gropes and 'peer pressure' to 'perform. No sex. No teachers feeding drugs to young boys and being leniently dealt with. Did anyone notice above that the 24 year old female teacher was NOT charged with rape of a 12 year old boy?

One can Love a child, in a chaste way. It is a gift of Love that can be given. It does not need to be sexually consumated. A grown man (well, 17 is considered 'man' these days, as far as crime is concerned) can find he has fallen in love with a young girl. A grown woman can fall in love with a young boy.  That is what nature does. It causes us to 'Fall'. But we do not have to crawl.

We do not, as women often use as an excuse for their actions, have to 'follow my heart', ( a euphemism for her nether regions), or be 'swept off my feet', and 'couldn't help myself'.

The gift of patience, chastity, graciousness, devotion..... all very time consuming for today's far better off people.

We are not in Hobbes' day. Life is not so solitary, poor, nasty, brutish and short.  We have gained a great deal since then but also seem to have lost other aspects of great value.


Pax.