We live in an age where the behaviours and abilities of women to be rude, nasty and violent have increased markedly.
But while men seem to have become less violent toward women, despite the PC cant and vast amounts of public monies spent to say the opposite, we see women's violence to both one another and to men increasing.
Many fine, decent women come into the Tavern. I do not wish them to be offended when a customer or two points out flaws. Not in them as such. There is good and bad in all of us under our skins and our task in life includes eradication the bad and enhancing the good. Some of us get a helping hand. Some go the other way.
Mean girls grow to be mean women. Oh for the sugar and spice little girls of yesteryear who could become nice ladies.
But a professional lady came by to question the past ladylike behaviours. It was not all frothy white petticoats. And another report came in from the Land of the Long White Cloud detailing a horrible and more recent example. We also took a look at girls who just wanna have fun - of a nasty sort.
It is quite rare for the Tavern to see folk thrown or pushed out of the door. We hear the rude and nasty outside the hedges but the bouncer keeps them at bay. But we do sometimes have the odd altercation inside and it is often ladies doing the altercating! One tries to be kind, but firm.
We see nasty violent behaviours all around us. Where 'society' and 'authorities' have always condemned and punished bad male behaviour, we now have that same society and authority actively encouraging bad female behaviour. It is rewarded.
Women in power positions - such as that awful Alison Saunders woman in the UK, heading up the Prosecutions bizzo, go after even mild men, inventing crime where they are quite innocent and actually paying women to falsely accuse. The evidence abounds and you can find it yourselves with ease.
Has that propensity for women to accuse and be vicious suddenly arisen? Or has it always been there, waiting for encouragement and reward?
Ditta Oliker, Ph.D., is a clinical psychologist in Los Angeles, and she has been to the cinema.
Bullying in the Female WorldThe Hidden Aggression Behind the Innocent Smile"Kick him where it hurts" - "Punch him harder" - "Pin him down till he yells uncle". These are some of the sounds associated with male aggression. In fact, the word aggression was only applied to the males of our species, expressed in physical action and captured in words like hitting, pushing, punching, beating and ganging-up. Included in any description was anger that seemed to be the force behind the aggressive act.
Until fairly recently, there were no sounds associated with female aggression -- as if it didn't exist.
It's only in the last decade or so that aggression by the female -- in the form of social or relational aggression -- has been recognized.What made me think of this was watching the film The Help based on the novel by Kathryn Stockett, now a popular new movie. It is the story of life in Mississippi in the early 1960's and how a group of affluent White women relate to the Black maids who care for them and their children and how, in turn, the maids feel about how they are being treated. It dramatically captures the distance between the two groups and the underlying racial biases of that time.
What struck me as I was watching the film is how it also dramatically and effectively captures the emotional and psychological violence of social aggression, including the sting and cruelty of the verbal "weapons" women use.
The words now associated with female aggressive behavior include: excluding, ignoring, teasing, gossiping, secrets, backstabbing, rumor spreading and hostile body language (i.e., eye-rolling and smirking). Most damaging is turning the victim into a social "undesirable".
The behavior and associated anger is hidden, often wrapped in a package seen as somewhat .....
harmless or just a "girl thing".
OK. The 'black maid' phenomenon may not be familiar outside of America, but the schoolyards across the western world have been breeding it for over a century.The covert nature of the aggression leaves the victim with no forum to refute the accusations and, in fact, attempts to defend oneself leads to an escalation of the aggression. The film captures a number of these "weapons" as well as a pattern found in the interactions of males; the justification for the use of the same kind of aggression -- physical or social -- by the "good guy" in response to the original aggression by the "bad guy".
Comparison between male and female aggression shows strong and obvious similarities. Motivation for both groups usually includes: a desire for power, for control, for achieving greater social status and popularity, jealousy, fear and derailing competition.
Aggressive behavior for both male and female children can be found as early as preschool age, is most prevalent in adolescence and can, as the movie so clearly illustrates, continue well into adulthood.
Both sexes form social structures that lead different members to assume specific roles and characteristics. For example, in a female group (as seen in the movie) the one with the power is like the "Queen Bee" with a contingent of followers. Her friends do what she wants, she is charming when she wants to be, she's manipulatively affectionate, she takes no responsibility for hurting another's feelings, and defines right and wrong by the loyalty or disloyalty shown to her.
She is usually the one who decides who should be the victim.
And where better to see that but on the street. Young women, barely out of the school training playground are 'empowered' to think they can take on men and exhibit the worst behaviours of the worst men. These are the product of Feminism.The film also captures the dilemma of those who feel helpless to help the victim because of their need to not stir the anger of the Queen Bee and become alienated from the group.What the film doesn't show is that the effects of social aggression can be longer lasting and more damaging than physical aggression.
Since the "weapons" have a stealth nature to them, there is less possibility of anticipating the specifics of an attack and fewer actions to defend against an attack. This negative effect is particularly damaging during adolescence when the importance of acceptance in a peer group is maximized.
Adding to the pain inflicted on the victim is the lack of support by teachers and other adults who view the bully -- often a popular and charismatic young woman -- as innocent of such negative behavior. Thus the strong positive reputation of the bully makes it difficult for a victim to get validation of the bullying and causes a victim to suffer the additional pain of not being believed and not getting any support.Relational aggression negatively impacts "mirroring" - a peer group's reflected reaction to an individual. Caught in the web of punishing aggression by peers, a young person's internal sense of self becomes diminished and felt as being "a loser" - "a reject" and "not as good". Self-esteem is low and feelings of insecurity may persist throughout life. What is also affected is the ability to trust as an adult and to be free to be open to close relationships.
A recent development in social aggression is cyber bullying, acted out by both sexes. In this type of aggression, the perpetrator uses social networking tools - email, Facebook, Twitter - to inflict damage, particularly the spreading of socially harmful rumors of others.
Recent reports of several suicides by young adolescents who were targeted speak to the damaging power of this kind of aggression.I was also aware, watching this film, of how new technologies have changed our world. In the 1960's the nature and power of relational aggression was more muted because these new stealth weapons did not yet exist.
The Help ends on a positive note, in some ways mirroring the positive changes in race relationships since the 1960's and the civil rights movement.
Hmmmm. There IS a movement already but our society is well down the road to perdition rejecting it. It has been around for 2000 years and was getting to the point of 'forming' the backbone of our civilisation. But the decline and deliberate destruction of Christianity, starting in the 1500's and now followed up with 'enlightenment' and 'humanism', and Feminism, is busy opening the door to the sheer evil of Islam.It may be time, with the power of the internet being used as a powerful weapon of covert aggression, to start a movement to change the nature of human relationships as they relate to both physical and social aggression.
That our entertainment biz perpetuates and rewards the worst behaviours is often commented upon in the bars. Here is an example (which thankfully has not reached Oz shores - yet ). This is so clearly a put-up job, despite the faux hilarity of the situation, with those involved eager for their 20 seconds of focus upon them.
And to move on from the riotous girls tackling and attacking men half again their size outside a pub, we were shown the hidden side of Domestic Violence with an astonishingly rare finding against a woman in a Court.
Controlling girlfriend 'first woman convicted' of new UK domestic abuse offenceA university graduate is believed to be the first woman convicted under new domestic abuse laws in the UK after scalding her boyfriend with boiling water, stabbing him and keeping food from him.
Jordan Worth, 22, banned her partner from their bed, decided what clothes he could wear, isolated him from friends and family and even took over his Facebook account.
She was jailed for seven-and-a-half years after pleading guilty to the offence of controlling or coercive behaviour in an intimate relationship, introduced in 2015, as well as wounding with intent and causing grievous bodily harm with intent.Worth, came from a loving and supportive family, made her boyfriend's life a misery, exercising control over him deciding what he could wear shortly after they moved in together, Luton Crown Court heard.Raised in Ridgmont, Herts, she had been a high performer at school and was a trained gymnast.She gained a 2:1 Honours Degree in Fine Arts from the University of Hertfordshire and had been volunteering for an animal charity but wanted to become a teacher.She had also raised money for children in Africa.
But Judge Nic Madge heard that there were two sides to Worth, who controlled every aspect of her partner's life at their home in the village of Stewartby in Bedfordshire.Worth and her partner had met at college in 2012 when they were both 16, Maryam Syed, prosecuting, told the court.She became violent towards the man, who suffered from hydrocephalus which is caused by a buildup of fluid inside the skull which made him vulnerable, using blunt objects to strike him, wounded him with a knife and didn't help him get to hospital for treatment.For nine months he couldn't sleep in the same bed as her, the court was told.The charge of controlling or coercive behaviour covered a period from April of 2016 to June 2017, when police were called to the couple's home.Neighbours said they often heard them arguing and the sounds of things being thrown in the house, Syed said.The victim was heard by his neighbours shouting at Worth: "Get off me, you are hurting me."He was seen on occasions with black eyes and to be limping and with his arm in sling.Once Worth was seen at window by a neighbour "armed" with a screwdriver or hammer, the court heard.Another neighbour heard the victim shouting "Get off me. Get off my head. Don't keep doing that to my head."The court heard it was in June of last year that neighbours called police to the couple's home in the village in the early hours after hearing shouting.Paramedics noted injuries to his hand, burns to arms and legs which were being self treated with cling film.There was cling film round his ankles, and a hand wound that was bleeding.He was taken to Bedford Hospital's acute clinical unit and then to Addenbrookes Hospital.The prosecutor said he had second and third degree burns which will leave permanent scarring. The court was told Worth had thrown boiling hot water over her partner.On June 6 he was examined at the Lister Hospital in Stevenage and found to have burns on his legs as well as stab wounds about his body and limbs.Days later Worth was arrested.
Judge Madge told Worth that as well as the violence she had carried out on her partner she had refused him adequate bedding and food.He said she would "belittle" her partner and discouraged him from contacting friends and his family."She accepts that she has in the past, on a number of occasions, used blunt objects and implements to strike him and that he suffered injuries as a result of her doing so," he said.
I presume her new partner is a complete half-wit and would hope he does not visit this Tavern. She too."She accepts using boiling or hot water to cause injury to him. She accepts that she has in the past used a knife to cause injury to her partner."He suffered from hydrocephalus and had a vulnerable head and he became increasingly isolated."Worth, who is now in a new relationship, was made the subject of a restraining order which prevents her from contacting her ex for an indefinite period.
Is Mz Worth with her education and empowerment an ususual case? Well it is unusual for her to be sentenced to jail for seven years. Just think, had she been a man who put a piece of bacon at the door of a mosque she would have got a 15 year sentence.
The world is mad and getting badder.
Let us peer over the hedge and see the sort of girls we are breeding. Again, the entertainment bizzo takes girls (and boys) and turns them into the sort one tries to avoid.
I prefer the sugar and spice. And the bacon.